Before I got on my spiritual path, I was very heavily invested in judging others: how they looked, talked, or ate along with their occupation, their mate, and their beliefs (especially if they didn’t agree with mine) to name just a few of them. I started on my path due to an accident some 10-11 years ago.
During my journey, I went to many spiritual seminars and I began to realize how judging others was of no benefit to me, in fact, it causes me more harm than good. Then I learned about the mirroring factor (and I’m not talking about disk mirroring for disc recovery here!). Everyone we have in our lives is a mirror for us to learn from and use that information to improve ourselves. At the time, I didn’t fully understand that. Now I do.
I believe that’s part of our lesson, our growing and our evolving spiritual growth. And if you’ve ever done this, you know it’s not always easy to do. Especially if the person, who is being that fabulous mirror for us right now, is someone we simply can’t stand! The thought of having anything in common with them is just too much to think about. I’ve even argued with it at times thinking that there is no way in hell I have that same trait or habit or whatever. When that happens to me, I have some major angina (pronounced in a decidedly Italian way: AHH – gi-nah, emphasis on the first syllable). I keep reliving the situation and it fuels the anger. These battles rage until I remember that in not facing the truth, I’m only holding myself back from being my best self. That is the payoff to making the change.
On the other side of the mirror, if you see something you love in another, then know that you have that same thing or you wouldn’t be able to see it in them. There was a time I couldn’t accept that lovely truth. I had so little self esteem, so little self worth, I couldn’t accept the good in me. Accepting something beautiful about myself would cause me something akin to physical pain. Now I delight in it!
So why do we so dislike seeing ourselves in others? Is it because we don’t want to face the truth about ourselves? Is it a fear that we can’t change that aspect of ourselves? Is it simply that we do not want to admit that we have that particular trait? Or is it that we don’t want to have anything in common with the person that we really don’t like? (Sounds like a fabulous mirror to me here!)
What are your thoughts on mirroring? Or what do you see when you look in the mirror? Do you love what you see?